To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. To view this licence, visit nationalarchives.gov.uk/doc/open-government-licence/version/3 or write to the Information Policy Team, The National Archives, Kew, London TW9 4DU, or email: psi@nationalarchives.gov.uk. I think there might be a problem'. I used to think the feeling of your baby kicking inside you and the sight of a foot poking against your skin were the most fantastic things in the world. 'Yes, if that's okay with you,' kind of thing, like you do. Most scans show that babies seem to be developing as expected, and none of the 11 conditions are found. You're in and out and that was it. Except for the persistent, nagging doubts. But on, in the middle of March, 10th March it was, we had a 20 week scan. My son's congenital heart defect was detected at the 20 week scan and he had 2 other markers, no . So I no longer trusted my instincts. But you know I knew we had, we had to make a decision that was right for the baby as well. The same anxious wait for a little, pathetic cry. And I could see, before she even said anything I could see that there was something wrong with the heart. I felt more informed, and I felt that that was what I needed in my head to see you know, that I've got to accept now that this, all these things are real on the screen and this was really my baby that's suffering all these things [sighs], but I was sad as well. Abortion has never raised any moral dilemmas for me and I am an atheist, so there are no religious issues. It was, 'Oh we'll come back to that'. That was the first time I had heard him cry. I thought surely everything is ok, as they couldn't detect twins the week before. After she had taken all the measurements, the sonographer told us that she was concerned with the length of the baby's limbs in relation to the head. Others, including those who had been given leaflets to read about the scan beforehand as well as some who were health professionals, said that they had been nave about the 20-week scan. Tommys is a registered charity in England and Wales (1060508) and Scotland (SC039280). I let out an animal scream and [wife] kind of leapt onto me on the bed. Seeing your baby on a screen can be really exciting. After preparing myself to face having to take the medication. I wasn't unduly worried at all. And my husband, we never got to sit next to each other in the consulting room, my husband was across the room from me, and I was sat next to the consultant, and we were laughing and joking with him about, you know, the home delivery, and everything was going to be, 'Are you still on for the home delivery?' Wishing to be anywhere, but here being told the same agonising truth over and over again. You could see her face, and the major aspect that was, that was the indication of what was wrong was the thickening at the back of the neck in this instance, which, when you're looking at a fetus is, you know, sort of half a centimetre thicker or not is completely immaterial to me, and would look like a completely normal neck, but from the point of view of the consultant was severely abnormal. You may like someone to come with you to the scan appointment. The contractions started very quickly and within an hour my waters had broken. I had a horrible feeling of relief. I loved him instantly and didn't want to let him go. I couldn't have the added responsibility for changing his mind. Another sick joke. 26/09/2019 22:46. She asked me how far gone I thought we were, and if I could have been mistaken. Some of the other conditions, such as heart defects, are more difficult to see. As I waited for the doctor back on the EPU unit. He was sure the consultant on Monday would see that the measurements were completely normal and that there was nothing to worry about. So it was quite common, this is what happens. I hadn't thought about the mechanics of such a late termination, but had assumed it would mean some kind of operation. My partner spent the weekend trying to convince me that things were OK. We must have had one before that as well, we must have had one before that, but it came back quite normal. And how wrong could they be? That they could have spotted something, or not? But it was very evident. But no. And so we had to go out a couple of times, [wife] had to walk around, and she had a drink of water, which is supposed to sort of change things inside, or help the baby turn around or something because the sonographer couldn't get the measurements she wanted. I know it sounds odd that you want to hear that it's wrong, but you, you know it's wrong, and you, you want to be reassured either that it's okay or is there something seriously wrong. Three midwives came and went. Again, no notes can have been written down because the midwife asked the same question. If this happens, you will be offered one further scan by 23 weeks of pregnancy. It will take only 2 minutes to fill in. He started to scan me with a cold expression, then told me, "it didn't look good" and that "my womb looked raggedy". I should stop being dramatic and pessimistic. And that was a terrible moment to be sort of hanging on, waiting. She just said, 'It's a bit short, it needs to be checked' again basically. We talked all night and thanked God for crap television. I just feel very unlucky. That was an extremely difficult day. I want to be nice again. It was just a few little things like the kidneys were hard to find, and the stomach was hard to find, but that might be because it wasn't filled with fluid. This one cannot show you anything, that's what's inside your mind. I couldn't work out what was taking so long and put it down to the doctor being young and inexperienced. There was cause for concern. We just couldn't use the words. hi ladies. Perhaps because we are alone in this, it has brought my partner and me very close. I felt crushed, I wanted him to at least acknowledge what had been found already. The hardest thing I have ever done. So he went out for a walk. Then I picked myself up. Soon, the doctor came and inserted the tablets that would induce labour. A long process of blood tests, scans, doctors and hospitals. The sonographer will be able to tell you the results of the scan at the time. The sonographer told me to take the notes, and the scan photos with me so they could review them also. Our baby was beautiful. You have accepted additional cookies. Public Health England (PHE) created this information on behalf of the NHS. The doctor told me he was 98% sure this was a failing twin pregnancy. And it all seemed so near at hand, you know, 31, 30 weeks, you feel like you're nearly, you're on the home stretch. And I, and, I felt the weight of deciding what to do about it. Let a mum know you're thinking of them send one of our personalised Mother's Day cards today, Home After that I got, I, it was about in, in 19-, hang on a minute, 2001 I got pregnant again, slightly unexpectedly. These were said to be soft markers fo a range of trisomies, 2 of which were incompatible with life. Instead, I had to raise a glass of water to my mouth, take a swig and swallow the tablet. 12/12/2012 22:41. It's been a heartbreaking nightmare. Some parents wondered if it was possible to have the same scan done at 16 weeks rather than 20 weeks. I didn't think my instincts were worth much. This might be uncomfortable. I was then told yet again bad news. Some stories I hear are amazing! And it was just a bit of a shock because it's not really what you want to hear - you don't really expect that. So we went home, me to rest in an attempt to prevent miscarriage, my partner to reassure us both. And you know, we were laughing and joking. I think I don't everything just seems a real blur because it was, it was such a strange experience. And you could see, where you should have a picture of 4 chambers, you could really see 2. Two days, after on Christmas Eve, (my 12 week date) I had more blood tests. So we went home really and I sort of had to think about it all night. This publication is available at https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/screening-tests-for-you-and-your-baby/11-physical-conditions-20-week-scan. If you are offered further tests, you will be given more information about them so that you can decide whether or not you want to have them. The thing that I have a very strong memory of is this child's face in amazing detail. So I trusted him. (See 'Resources'). And, it does not occur to you in the slightest. If you choose not to have the scan you can still have all other parts of your routine antenatal care. I came back probably about 17 weeks pregnant and had the anomaly scan at 20 weeks and like most people expected everything to be fine and to come away with a lovely picture but unfortunately that isn't what happened. or sort of light chat that we'd, we'd experienced before with previous scans. Wishing to be anywhere, but here being told the same agonising truth over and . I wrote a few things down last night when we were trying to go over things, just to remind myself. I want to stop having such horrible thoughts. And, sometimes, I wish I had invited my whole family into the hospital room to see him. The 18 -20 week fetal anomaly scan is a watershed in most pregnancies because for the majority of women it will be the last time they are scanned before giving birth. I did think it was a bit strange that she wasn't talking, and then she sort of said, 'Oh, I think there's a problem. . My partner went out with him, wanting to see him. And so this one can't tell you anything, it's pictures, you're going, you're going to see your baby, you're going to get pictures. I pray it's just her heart but I can't see anything else is wrong as I have been scanned by a consultant since I was 14 weeks and every time he has said everything looks okay and she is growing consistently. So it was, there was very, very little movement from the baby because I remembered first time round by that stage, you know, that the baby was quite big and it moved around a lot at a later scan. I still feel guilty, I still cry at random times. If an abnormality is confirmed or suspected, referral is usually required, although some obvious major fetal abnormalities, such as anencephaly, may not require a second opinion (this should be decided by local guidelines). It was sick. No, you couldn't see there was anything wrong. Severe chromosomal conditions such as Edwards' syndrome are now often picked up in the first trimester antenatal screening but itwill usually be more obviousat the 18- 20 week scan, though usually a firm diagnosis will not be made until one or two specialists have weighed up all available evidence about the baby - which usually means that another expert needs to scan the baby again, or until the woman has had an amniocentesis. We felt as if we were in limbo. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. Has anyone been told the sex incorrectly at their 20 week scan? 18-20 week scans provide clinicians with more information than earlier scans because by18 weeks a healthy baby should be larger and better developed. But you could see there was something wrong? So I took the test and jumped in the shower. Instead, we were shown to a room slightly away from the rest of the ward and the midwife stayed with us to talk through what was going to happen. So we went back the day after Boxing Day, the 27th, and the consultant greeted us, which made my alarm bells go, and she started scanning us and I think her lines were, 'What concerns me about this baby is that they've got a diaphragmatic hernia, which has meant that part of the stomach of the baby was in its chest cavity.'. It would be a personal tragedy for my partner and me, but that is all. Good luck has not come easily over the past few years. So I was, they couldn't actually finish the scan then, the baby was moving around too much, so they couldn't scan the heart and the stomach. There is always a chance that a baby may be born with a health issue that scans could not have identified. Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommys Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. We don't know, but it's not looking good'. He looked fine. Scans cannot find all conditions. Within it are a number of recommendations for the communication of findings from ultrasounds. I broke down and started hitting my disgusting body that had done this. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here), tbh, they never give you good news at scans. Several women had taken young children with them to the 20-week scan because they expected to see 'nice pictures of the baby'. This scan takes place between 18 weeks and 20 weeks 6 days of pregnancy and is commonly called the 20-week scan. And I went for, I went for a normal 12-week scan, at my local hospital and everything, they said everything was fine, there was no problem. Sometimes specialist scans such as 3D scans, or MRI scans, are used to examine the baby in greater detail. 13/12/2020 20:45. (See. The consultant had said it wouldn't be like a normal delivery. Though the 18-20 week scan can detect when certain parts of the baby's body have grown abnormally, it may not be possible for clinicians to identify why it has happened or make a firm diagnosis based on the scan alone. On the next shift, the new midwife asked us again. What would we like to do with the body? By this time, we were tired. I was experiencing some light bleeding for the past few days. Those two weeks were agonising for us both. Others said they were shocked because all the early diagnostic tests (e.g. Find more information and details of support groups on NHS.UK. Sam followed and I broke down. I popped out from work, telling my boss I'd be back in half an hour. I agreed to an internal scan as the sonographer said we could get a better picture of what was happening. The blood test confirmed it was twins. Well send you a link to a feedback form. The doctor didn't come. He felt doing more blood tests would only cause me more discomfort and false hope. Some people want to find out if their baby has one of the 11 conditions and some do not. I had to stop myself from yanking out the needle. I was willing the results to be normal. And then I can't remember an awful lot more about that scan apart from that feeling of searching of how to react in an unknown situation - your brain's kind of trying to work out what to say, what to do, but I had no idea what to say or what to do and I think my first thought was, does that mean our first daughter's okay? News stories, speeches, letters and notices, Reports, analysis and official statistics, Data, Freedom of Information releases and corporate reports. Actually you could tell from the brain development as he scanned up through the chambers of the brain, that one quarter of the brain, one chamber was not evident. Has anyone been told the wrong sex at 20 week scan? It felt like a lifetime to reach our 12-week-scan. And I can just remember flashing a look at you as if to say, 'Have I made a mistake here somewhere? At first the closeness came through a sense of guilt. I swallowed the tablet and we left the building. We're going to go and see them. And with each one we had to have the same conversations. And attribute some blame to them. I couldn't really believe what they were saying. Specialist scans are performed in specialist fetal units and if clinicians feel that there might be problems scanning will be done up to 32 weeks. My wife turned the screen away from her. But it is a soft marker for Edwards' syndrome. As I left the room to compose myself. At that point, I got very not upset but quite sort of strongly severe sort of with the people at the hospital saying, 'Look, you know, that's 24 hours, possibly a 48 hours' wait - that's not something that's tenable. That he - I think I was 21 weeks and 3 days, and he was coming up at 19 weeks and 4 days, or something like that. She brought up a picture of the heart on the screen. And I'm glad I did and she's glad she didn't. Some parents wondered if it was possible to have the same scan done at 16 weeks rather than 20 weeks. This was a ray of hope for us. Trying to carry on as normal, working and putting on a brave face. I would be put to sleep, and when I woke up I wouldn't be pregnant any more. Read full disclaimer. So when that happened to us I really didn't worry, I thought, you know, it was literally the baby was in awkward position, they couldn't see the heart and that was why. I was told they needed to do a blood test to get a bench mark of my hormone levels. It is extremely rare for these pregnancies to reach term as they typically spontaneously miscarry early in pregnancy. This was on the Friday. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here). But he was wrong. As you felt that, you know, it was probably going to show lots of problems and it just wasn't what we wanted, but at the same time we needed to sort of see it and, we needed to prove it I suppose. But I was struggling mentally with the anguish, grief and endless hospital visits. I had to wait for a doctor to explain the situation. And she sort of got up and walked out of the room and called someone in. And at that point I don't think we, I don't think we realised that there might have to be a decision, because we'd talked about it with, with Down's and the other possible problems, but at this point it was, well okay what can be done to fix the problem - because yes the heart's not developing properly but there must be something we can do. They said the brain was okay -, We were in there for a matter of minutes, literally -, In and out. It doesn't remove the guilt, but I don't know what else to do. Picture every packed football staduim up and down the country - all healthy pregnancies and births. This time, they discovered the baby has a two vessel cord (only one vessel from placenta to baby instead of two) and I've been monitored to make sure the baby grows properly and kidneys aren't damaged. I can't remember the exact words but she said, 'There might be some fatal problems with your baby'. I couldn't bear to see the baby and asked the midwife to take him away immediately. I was sent home with a leaflet, strong painkillers and two types of antibiotics. And so began the most bizarre day of my life. I had to take a tablet there and then, under the supervision of a nurse, to end the pregnancy. He felt strong and fit and healthy. Later, I did see and hold our baby. The results come in stages. We bought a two tests that evening (quite lucky as I messed the first one up!). Though the 18-20 week scan can detect when certain parts of the baby's body have grown abnormally, it may not be possible for clinicians to identify why it has happened or make a firm diagnosis based on the scan alone. Could you tell? My mum arrived early to look after our son, and my partner and I got a cab to the hospital. It seemed a very arbitrary system, and so you quite often sat outside in the waiting room for a couple of hours before you actually got to see the consultant, which was, seemed you know, I kind of remember thinking before we went in to see him on the particular day when we found out there was a problem, 'Why are we sitting here? So carried on with the plans, and, you know, planning for the, another baby to come along and then we went for a 20- week scan which is obviously the big one and very exciting, seeing all the arms and legs and once again everything was going fine, 'Look here's the baby, here's the length of baby'. So it was just, we were coming up to the 20-week scan and I was just getting more relaxed, just actually starting to look at maybe baby catalogues or, you know, going down the baby aisle at the shops, which I'd always avoided. The first result, which tells you if the baby has Down's syndrome, is ready in three days, but the other chromosomal problems cannot be eliminated for up to three weeks. And for that whole time, my partner and I were both crying uncontrollably. Specialist scans
And thank God I did. And then, so I went to my next scan, which was the 20-week abnormality scan, and we took our first child with us, I think he was 17 months old at the time. As two youngest siblings, we were both permanently stuck in the irresponsible, childish role. The people who did know what was going on seemed far too sure that we were doing the right thing, that there was really no choice to be made. No, we really didn't, with hindsight we probably should have, but not at all, it never occurred to us to be worried about it. I guess the morphine made it easier. I remained positive, we researched lots of cases of mistaken dates, inconclusive scans, and compared them to our situation; scrutinising everything to try and believe it was all one big misunderstanding. And the first few things they said it didn't sound as thing, as though things were terribly wrong. Again the legs were quite twisted, they said that the baby's sternum was very short - things weren't in proportion you know - the head was quite large, the neck was very thick, there wasn't really like a neck as such it was just things were kind of - there were lots of things that obviously the consultant could see that we weren't aware of. Some people had underestimated how serious any abnormality found at this stage could be for the baby. And it turned out the baby's heart wasn't forming properly, the chambers weren't forming properly. chances of bad news at 20 week scan mumsnet. We had amnio and then spent a week in absoute anguish waiting for the outcome which was no trisomies. It was another consultant, who said, "I'm afraid I have some bad news - your baby has Down's syndrome." You have rejected additional cookies. She describes having to make a momentous decision very quickly, and the ferment of relief, guilt and grief that followed, Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from the Guardian every morning. I ran into the bedroom to tell Sam, who was ecstatic. Nights were impossible. So instead, I was advised to go home and let nature take its course. I've been incredibly lucky to have such amazing support from Sam, my mum, and close friends and family. Thankfully I was met by an amazing sonographer, she was compassionate and understanding. And the local hospital wanted to send us off to the regional hospital to actually confirm that, and were not really prepared to say at that time that there was something very seriously wrong. But he was not sure. You know there's always that bit on the bottom of the thing, 'These are diagnostics, do not bring other children,' - blah, blah, blah.. it's not, you know, it's not a family outing kind of thing, but it feels like it. The thing about that which I felt was difficult is that we could tell when being scanned that there was something very seriously wrong. So and you could see the exomphalus, this little pouch, which was obviously just the intestines where they are. It was exactly like the labour I had with my first child. If necessary, you will be referred to a specialist, possibly in another hospital. On the third day, we got a phone call. Being generous and kind generally happens only when you're happy. Enough for two weeks after he had been cremated. It's quite common, perhaps 1 in 10 they find these, and within a few weeks they disappear. I didn't have a clue. When I think about how long it took them to deliberate ultimately, maybe not, but it just felt like a bit of a fast food situation, didn't it? Sometimes women were told that the sonographer had found a 'marker' or sign of a chromosomal condition and had to wait for an amniocentesis to confirm the findings. Health professionals use the 18-20 week scan to examine the baby's size and position, and also to check if his/her brain, heart, lungs and other internal organs are developing as expected. We need to have your opinion'. Many parents were shocked by findings from the 20-week and later scans. You might be offered another test to find out for certain if your baby has one of the conditions. We'll make an appointment with the senior sonographer, the consultant at the local hospital, and she'll do your scan and she'll be able to tell you more things'. At the time the same thing had, exactly the same thing had happened to my friend a month before, and her scan was absolutely fine. The sonographer then passes a hand-held probe over your skin to examine the babys body. Can you remember that minute. It sounds crazy, but I just knew. My heart goes out to you OP. Can't seem to find info on the Internet. And then all of a sudden, I was still laughing and we were all very upbeat, and then suddenly, he suddenly said, but I was still, still laughing, and he said to me, 'Oh, there might be a problem, there might be a problem with the, I think this baby has hydrocephalus'. I'm trying to understand because I haven't seen a 3-D scan, what it tells the parents? He had to come to the decision by himself. The scan can provide information that may mean you have to make further, important decisions. All the time, the baby was kicking and I felt like a murderer waiting to strike her victim. Entering the labour ward, I waited for someone to say, "Go home, you are 16 weeks too early." Most hospitals do not allow children to attend scans as childcare is not usually available. I think the whole experience has made me a pretty nasty person. He started to scan me with a cold expression, then told me, "it didn't look good" and that "my womb looked raggedy". We left the hospital a couple of hours later. Some people had underestimated how serious any abnormality found at this stage could be for the baby. We bought little outfits, teddies, and researched all the vitamins and foods that I could eat. The ultimate betrayal. All pregnant women should be given the booklet by their midwife or GP Screening tests for you and your baby by Public Health England, which gives detailed information about the types of scan offered and what they are looking for. Our nightmare began when I went for my 20-week scan. Possibly with hindsight we could have been more worried about it, but was probably a good thing we weren't, because we weren't worried about anything basically. And they took me to another room and they explained that the baby had what they thought was ventriculomegaly or something. My wife had been very, very healthy, more healthy than the first pregnancy, and of course was shattered by the fact that the news, the news was appalling, very serious faces. I went away and came back, and she couldn't get a good picture. When I told him what had happened, he refused to believe anything was wrong and said he'd sort it out when he came home. The pain was bearable but uncomfortable, the hospital rang me a few days later and asked me how I was. I feel empty and incomplete. Please ask your hospital about this before your appointment. Usually, sonographers will ask a senior sonographer colleague to confirm findings and this should be done immediately. We scattered his ashes over a bunch of snowdrops. And my partner and I would have a completely different life from the one we'd imagined. All the hopes, dreams, and plans we made with our little bumps has been taken away from us. The first midwife seemed to understand what we were trying to say, and said she would ask the doctor to come and talk to us. He's now had the all clear and is wriggling round on . All my instincts were to protect my belly, yet here I was allowing someone to stick a huge needle into it. We were denying him his life. We had the 20 week scan yesterday and got some devastating news. We thought it would all be over very quickly but, in fact, it was another 11 hours before the baby was delivered. The nursery I had selected for our two-year-old son; my maternity leave; the bunk beds; the summer holiday suitable for a newborn baby. And I couldn't escape the feeling that I was being selfish. From losing my dad to his battle with cancer, to then having to face another battle with cancer and my mum; thankfully she pulled though. We went in, had a scan, I can't remember the exact sequence of events because the baby was still in the wrong position. It feels very lonely and isolating. Surely he couldn't have missed anything else that is so serious x. So had to come back in a week's time for a scan, which again is quite a common thing I found out.
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